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How to become positive in Life

By on Nov 1, 2019 in Blog |

How to become positive in Life 

If you are searching how to become positive in life, then Embrace the negative. Those who want higher emotional intelligence (or EQ) must necessarily make their peace with negative emotions.

The very term Emotional Intelligence tells us that it has everything to do with the way we handle our emotions. Even here, most people don’t have much trouble negotiating positive emotions. Negative emotions, on the other hand, tend to leave scars on the individual and on relationships. Therefore, people wanting to enhance their emotional intelligence must have the ability to negotiate negative emotions, and even leverage them.  To further learn how to become positive in life, a person must bear the following mantras in mind:

Pointers – How to become positive in Life

1.   Negative emotions are natural

This self-evident statement is worth repeating. Since life is a journey of ups and downs, emotions too have a rollercoaster effect on the mind. They swing from the positive to the negative, aligned with the positive and negative developments in life. Accepting that negative emotions are integral to life helps us accept them and leads us one step closer to sanity.

2.   Negative emotions linger for longer

“Positive emotions are like sparklers – they dissipate in no time. But negative emotions add a melancholic fragrance to our life like incense sticks.” This is a dialogue from an old Bollywood movie – the thought is lyrical, beautiful and truthful.

Knowing that the effects of negative emotions tend to last longer help us “just be” with these emotions, instead of feeling victimized by them. As a bonus, we might also learn to celebrate and treasure the blips of positive emotions as and when they occur, and learn how to become positive in Life by being aware of our emotions.

3.   Culture suppresses negative emotions

In many eastern cultures, children are taught to suppress negative emotions based on gender. For example, girls are encouraged not to get angry while boys are ridiculed if they cry to express sadness. As a result, children of both genders grow up converting an “unacceptable” negative emotion into another misleading negative emotion. Boys might get angry when they feel sad, and girls might cry when they are angry.

To foster a healthy relationship with negative emotions, we have to unlearn these cultural idioms that prevent us from experiencing the entire spectrum of naturally-occurring emotions.

4.   Negative emotions are negative only in the short term

A jubilant person might be so distracted that they cross the road recklessly and end up in the hospital. A person experiencing fear – for instance, a student about to appear for an examination – might use the fear as a motivating and guiding force.

Both positive and negative emotions are so termed because of the short-term impact they have on a person. Knowing this gives another reason not to avoid negative emotions.  This awareness goes a long way in ensuring that we raise the awareness of our awareness around this concept around how to become positive in life. 

5.   Negative emotions are growth tools

You will not feel fear if I tell you that a fire has broken out on the other side of the world. But if I tell you that a fire has broken out in your building, you feel fear and are immediately alert.

Every negative emotion is a great teacher whispering into our ears, telling us what’s important to us. We cannot feel negative emotions about an event that doesn’t affect us. So every time we feel any negative emotion – such as fear, anger, sadness, guilt, shame etc – we can ask, “What caused the emotion? What can I learn from it? Has the same thing happened before? If there is a pattern, how can I break it?”

Unresolved past issues might intensify negative emotions. For instance, if you had an authoritarian parent who made you feel cornered throughout your childhood, you might flare up every time anybody tries to assert authority in your adulthood – be it your boss, the police constable or even a romantic partner. Others might wonder why you reacted so violently to a seemingly harmless interaction. The moral: the more intense a negative emotion, the higher the opportunity for learning about oneself.

Those who practise self-awareness can reap these opportunities for learning and growth every day. As you become comfortable with the presence of negative emotions within you, you will find yourself more accepting of the negative emotions of others too. Your ability to connect with others and nurture them increases.

Concluding thoughts – How to become positive in Life

So, the next time you feel a negative emotion, stop doing whatever you are doing and connect deep within, as this is a powerful way to learn how to become positive in life. Let the negative emotion wash over you like a gentle wave; let it guide you to the thought or event which led to its birth. Take a moment to appreciate the beautiful inner machinery which offers you deep insights into yourself. Chances are, you will be thankful for your negative emotions, as you should be.  Self Coaching skills and how to coach yourself is a great skill to learn. You can consider to read how to use NLP to improve your coaching skills.  

If you want to further learn how to become positive in life, you can consider to join our NLP Practitioner + NeuroSemantics Practitioner program in India in Bangalore, Delhi, Mumbai, which is one of the top courses available in Asia and facilitated by Vikram Dhar the best NLP trainer in India.

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